So, let's break what is an implicit taboo.

Infertility is an uncomfortable topic. Infertility sucks balls. But it exists, and affects more people than you know. For each pregnancy or young family, there are couples or individuals trying to start a family, either naturally or through IVF (and a plethora of other treatments), or even more sadly experience complications, miscarriages and stillbirths.

And it's invisible.

Couples and individuals on an emotional rollercoaster every day, on monthly cycles of hoping and waiting, and if going through medical treatment, more interminable waiting and reading and medicating, feeling pressure, enormous uncertainty, anger, sadness, feelings of failure, and sometimes great successes.

You can see a baby or a baby bump, but there's no evidence of yet another month when the period arrives, or the 12th month of waiting for a donor, or the first day back to work after another miscarriage, there's no signs on the outside.

It's easy to feel alone, even when you know you're not.

It's been said that trying to conceive can be "Every month was a funeral without a coffin.". There comes a time when all the amazing support you've had in private from family, true friends and confidantes that you don't talk about because of reasons, must be recognised. When you're ready.

Until then, remember, it's not failing, it's no-one's fault. Unfortunately desire and worthiness doesn't affect the outcome; things happen or don't. It's not fair, but life isn't fair, life is just stuff that happens, with people. And the people are great, and help you to accept the uncertainty and reality of the situation.

Be proud for the grit you've displayed by continuing to try, and happy that the support you've gained has helped you grow close to people. If a couple, as a team, supporting each other in so many ways.

I'm continuing to go through it and I am unspeakably grateful for the help and support we've had. If you're trying or dealing with anything fertility related, you're not alone, good luck and stay strong.